Ron
and Friends
Anybody who has visited my home in person knows that I share my space with a complicated ecosystem of plush friends, around whose existence a certain amount of lore has embarrassingly woven itself.
I don't want to be the only person who knows how all of this works, so I'm going to take this opportunity to introduce you to some of the companions who also live at my house...
RON
RAPTOR
Utahraptor boschensisThe main man, the legend, the V.I.R (Very Important Raptor). Lover of orange-coloured junk food and floppy sockies. Has many outfits, his own driver's licence, and opinions about vegetables (blehhhh). Loves nothing better than stealing other people's food, particularly chips (I have long suspected an evolutionary link between this species of Utahraptor and the modern seagull).
15th November
MUFFIN
Heaterodontosaurus caseus (juvenile)Adult heaterodontosaurs have an internal heat gland that allows them to raise their own body temperature to create high levels of exothermicity. Muffin, being on the younger side, hasn't got his yet; but like all heaterodontosaurs is an obligate fromagivore (which is to say, only eats cheese). All forms of cheese and cheese-related dishes - the hotter and meltier the better - are easily metabolised by the heaterodontosaur digestive system. Heaterodontosaurs are also known for their exceptionally high intelligence; even at his young age, Muffin is already prodigiously interested in STEM subjects and loves to read. He also, by the way, helped oversee the development of this very website.
26th April
SLIP
Pudding rex (juvenile)Pudding rexes eat only desserts and sweet treats, and young Slip hasn't yet fully developed his teeth to chew through some of the crunchier puddings available. At the moment, he tends to favour more liquid-based desserts such as those involving custards, whipped cream, and rice puddings. Poor Slip is also very clumsy; when I first met him in a museum gift shop, he had several injuries and was feeling rather sorry for himself (sporting a couple of nasty-looking busted seams). Fortunately, I was able to nurse him back to health, repair him and bandage him up properly, although he never seems to completely heal because he's always bumping into things and falling over.
25th August
RONSON
Utahraptor boschensis (subadult)Whereas his dad obsesses over orange food, Ronson favours yellow - specifically, this young raptor has harboured a lifelong passion for bananas. He can usually be found sitting in the household fruit bowl and tending to his current crop of 'nanas - making sure they ripen up at the correct pace and don't get too unruly. It's important work, and we're all terribly grateful that Ronson takes his interest so seriously. Ronson was born at the Natural History Museum in London, and if you look closely near the entrance to the dinosaur gallery therein, you can actually find a metal plaque commemorating his birth.
10th February
RONDA
Utahraptor boschensis (subadult)Ronda is the only dino denizen who doesn't live in the main house with the rest of the raptors; instead, she lives in and looks after Raptor 1 (our car). Our Ronda is a little petrolhead, and loves nothing better than the brrm-brrm of the engine and life on the open road. Like Ron, she has her own driver's licence, although how she passed her test is anyone's guess.
7th September
RAMONA
& GRAPE
Utahraptor boschensis (juvenile) & Triceratops yappusMona is the youngest of the raptors in our house and spends all of her time with her beloved pet Grape, a tiny green Triceratops who dances and yaps excitedly around her all day. However, she has terrible eyesight and has been known to misidentify the occasional lime as her loyal companion. Full of energy and not too bright, Mona is easily transfixed by the sight of circles and round objects, for which she has a particular fascination.
15th February
MALLORY
Anas platyrhynchosThe dapper dabbler. Our resident senior mallard is an elegant chap and can always be relied upon to appreciate the finer things in life. Like most ducks, Mallory very much appreciates smooth jazz. Also enjoys breadcrumbs, wet weather, and going for a jolly good dabble (you never know what you'll find if you stick your head under the water, he says - could be all sorts of things down there at the bottom of the pond!).
14th January
DINAH
Frownodon arnoldiEverybody loves the slow, plodding, and easily astonished Dinah - none more than Ron, who adores his Christmas-coloured companion. Dinah really loves multicoloured sweet foodstuffs, and is drawn to bags of Haribo and packets of M&Ms like a moth to a flame.
3rd March
KIARA
Phascolarctos cinereusKiara and Muffin share a fondness for jigsaw puzzles, crosswords and brain teasers, and often solve them together, but Kiara - being from Australia - really prefers to contemplate them upside-down. This inquisitive little koala loves to snack on eucalyptus and leaves of all kinds, and also likes to sleep a lot; in fact, it's not uncommon to see her suddenly faceplant without warning as the urge to catch forty winks takes hold.
19th September